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A Message from Double A

Essay by   •  November 30, 2010  •  Essay  •  488 Words (2 Pages)  •  1,184 Views

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What's up, Juggalos? A lot's been going down here at the ol' Hatchet, and in the face of some very heavy resistance, as promised, there is going to be a Gathering this summer! Concerts, wrestling, seminars, contests, camping, Family love, and oh so much more... And it's for cheaper than it's ever been outdoors! Four days and four nights of non-stop flavor, for $150! Plus, you can pitch a tent for all four days for as little as $25 more! And that shit is crazy fresh. But truth be told, things need to be a little different this year.

We searched everywhere--and we mean, EVERYWHERE--for a place that would take the Gathering. Fairgrounds, parks, amphitheatres, convention centers, even fuckin' nudist colonies--and no one was interested in hosting the event. Each year, the Gatherings get harder and harder to put on, to the point where this year, it almost didn't happen. But in spite of nearly impossible odds, we did pull it off. So the Hatchet has come through and done its part for this year. But as far as next year goes, that's on y'all--the Juggalos.

We have to straighten things up, or there ain't gonna be any more Gatherings. The only way that local authorities would agree to let the Gathering happen this year was to have the local PD on hand and in the park, uniformed and probably also undercover. We have been given assurances that the cops are gonna be professional and not be haters on the Juggalos or ruin anyone's good times. These officers have been working concerts at this location for many years. They're not rookies. If we're cool with them, they'll be cool with us.

But what definitely is not gonna fly is walkin' around with blunt in hand. If that's the main thing you love about the Gathering, then it'd probably be in your best interests to pass on going this year. Also, if you're coming down to the Gathering to sell drugs, save us all the drama, 'cause they're gonna pop your ass real quick. And finally, don't trash the fuckin' place. There's garbage barrels throughout the park. Walk the extra ten feet and throw your trash in there, instead of throwing it on the ground. This is the only place we could find that'll let us have a Gathering, so let's show the grounds and the people that work there some respect, as they were nice enough to take a chance on us and let us come.

Juggalos,

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