Alligators on Treadmills

Dear Commissioner of the MLB,

My brother Andres is very challenged at playing baseball. He can't throw that good, is horrible at batting and don't even get me started on his defense. But the worst part is that he thinks he's good. I try to knock some sense into his empty skull, but he just wont except the fact that he's challenged at playing baseball. Unlike me I'm very gifted at the all-American past time. Its my life, what did you expect? I know my brother wants to be as good as his bro, and I think with at least a couple of years worth of training and a tiny pinch of magic all this can happen. Okay lets get to the point of this letter. I was wondering if you could please send over a good personal trainer or even maybe a pro player ( a good one ). We can't afford some thing like that, and it would be a dream for him to be nearly as good as me, or even as good as me ( but never better than me ). Please consider this letter into consideration, at least take some time to read it. You can be setting someone's life for them. You can make my brother's dream come true. Any questions call me at 310-510-2256.

Sincerely,