Complimenting Routines in English and Learner English

Complimenting Routines in English and Learner English

Complimenting is a tool that can be used to establish friendship. It also is an important social strategy for many a time it acts as an opener for a conversation and later facilitates meaningful social communication to follow. Neglecting to give compliments could even be understood as a sign of disapproval. Moreover, the inappropriate use of compliments may cause embarrassment and even offense in many cultures.

There are many factors that determine how non-native speakers of (L2) respond to compliments when compared with native speakers (L1). Some of these factors are; schemata, speech events, socio-cultural norms and linguistic etiquette. Schemata is a pre-existing knowledge involving things. L2 speakers who had been learning the language for a longer period of time responded differently to the more recent learners of the language. A lot of the long term speakers of L2 had managed to acquire a lot of the correct responses to compliments through their daily interactions with the L1 speakers and the amount of social interactions they have with the L1 speakers. A lot of the younger L2 learners found that they found television to be quite a help when trying to adjust to the social norms. Many of these L2 speakers found that they could respond to the common compliments like "Nice shirt/top" rather easy to respond to with a simple thank you rather than down playing the compliment with something like " It was rather cheap" as was the situation with the more recent learners of L2. This is also relates to the socio cultural norms of the L1 culture. Many of the Asian speakers found it difficult to receive compliments since their culture is about modesty and humility. As such many of them responded usually by down playing, denying and deflecting the compliment to someone else. It was rather uncomfortable for these L2 speakers to accept compliments that were in self praise. Culture of the L1 usually does determine how non native speakers respond to compliments.

Many Indians and Asians find it difficult to respond positively to a compliment since it is a rather alien concept in their culture of modesty and humility. Compliments are given in their native languages but usually not in regards to self praise. One of the interviewee commented that usually compliments were given in a rather indirect manner. For instance if an Indian is going to compliment one on his good fortune it won't be a direct compliment like "You've really worked hard to achieve this" but rather is told that it is not the result of an individual's hard work but rather a result of the good deeds of his parents and other illustrious ancestors who have brought about this luck and wealth. The whole idea of karma passing down generations is something that is more acceptable in from of praise rather than praising just one person. Also the praise is usually indirect that if the parents have done great things then it is without question that the fruits of that tree will be the same. This does then explain why any compliments given in praise of an individual's effort are usually deflected to some other cause or denied as rather untrue. Many found that when they denied the praise it was not that they were implying that the other person is lying or has not got his facts right but rather volleying back the compliment to the person giving it. When many Indians denied the compliment it was usually meant to imply that the person making the compliment is far too generous and it is his thinking that makes him feel that something is worth complimenting.

Asian students also found accepting compliments rather difficult as it was not in tandem with the culture of the native language. Humility is an important concept of the Buddhist culture and anyone who enjoys such self praise is in fact rather vain. Praise regarding personal attributes, achievements and possessions were regarded as something that was symbol of vanity. These according to the L1 do not determine who a man is but rather it is the deeds of this person which are important. These good deeds will be rewarded by great personal attributes, achievements and material possessions. That in itself a reward and praise for the great deeds. It seems that there is no need for a secondary compliment after this.

Moreover, non-native speakers found that there were no L1 resources to fall back on to reciprocate the compliment. Most L2 speakers depend on their schemata of their own language to respond to situations. When they find that there is no such concept in their L1 they fail to comprehend the social implications of such gestures. Compounding their confusion is also the social setting and the linguistic etiquette in which this conversation takes place. Social setting is also another very important factor that determines how people respond to compliments. Complimenting a person in his own immediate environment usually meant negation of the compliment. Also complimenting a person while making introductions would result in negation as well. These are certain social circumstances in which compliments are once more negated or deflected. Many non-native speakers find it rather embarrassing to be complimented. It is very difficult for them as such to respond to compliments. The L2 speakers who had been speaking the language for a longer period of time also responded rather similarly. When praised for a nice shirt the usual response began with thanks for but would usually be accompanied by something like "It's rather old" or simply "Thanks, it was a present". Although they do respond with the token thanks it is what follows that is interesting. Despite learning the norms of the L2 for a long period of time many found that they reverted to their own cultural norms. It would not be regarded as a faux pas to acknowledge the compliment with thanks but to justify the compliment in their L1 something more is usually added to it to some extent reciprocate or down play the compliment.

Moreover while the non native speakers found it rather difficult to accept compliments to some extent they found being the complimenter difficult as well. It was rather easy to give a compliment when it is initiated by someone else but being the originator of the compliment was rather difficult. Many found that if they gave a compliment it could be misconstrued as insincere. This was usually when their own culture came across in giving the compliment. Culturally compliments are promoting self-praise and since it is not a quality that they associate with anything positive they also did not want to be subjected to the fact that they were encouraging others to self-praise. Learning the correct grammar of the language is the considered the basic of learning another language but adopting the culture