High School

High School

Going into high school is a very scary time for most if not all people. Surrounded by randoms you either know or have never seen before in your life. Thinking way back to my first day of high school it was very nerve wrecking, I had no thoughts on what to wear, had no idea where to go for all my classes and mainly I was focused on what others would think of me. Was I good enough to fit in with the rest?  I had always brought my attention back to the movies and how there were different friend groups such as the jocks, the preps, the nerds, and the average Jeff’s. Which friend group would I be categorized as or be set in?

That first day of high school finally came around and I remember it like it could have just happened a minute ago, I woke up with the worst stomach ache. I put on as many outfits as I had in my closet, “Is this good mom..? Forget it I’ll try another one… How about now? Fuck! Why can’t I find anything good?” I finally found the perfect outfit; it was a red and blue flannel with an “ok” pair of Levis and my favorite Jordan’s. I felt so ready to accomplish the day but for some random reason that stomach ache did not seem to budge, it then led to my body being achy like the feeling you get when you know nothing about the test but the fact that there’s actually a test. As time went on I realized I had to get to the bus and see some people I knew to hopefully change my mood. My best friend Chris Ware was standing at the corner of the street waiting for the bus and I remember asking about five times how good I looked. He replied with the slightest response “Does it matter?” “Are you nervous?” I asked, and again with another smart response he states “for what, I am actually excited to see new people and make new friends, high school is going to be fun.” I thought to myself long and hard on the bus ride to school thinking what challenges may I face knowing how shy I am and how scared I was to just fit in.

Walking through the hallways I felt so little compared to the older kids and returning students of Glenbard East, I saw so many attractive girls but I knew they were so out of my league, I had no idea what to say to them. I saw a few of my old friends and ended up staying with them till the first period bell rang. When that bell rang I took a deep breath said bye to my friends as we all walked our separate ways staring at our schedules because they were not yet memorized. Walking into my first period class which was English I began to get the nervous sweats, I thought I may have had someone I knew in my class but not one student was a familiar face to me..  I sat in the back corner as more students piled into the room they had all known each other from the previous year in middle  school as they start cracking jokes sharing hugs and expressing their summer stories and vacations, I was wondering how do I get stuck in this class with no one? I looked at what they were wearing; random shirts, jeans and running shoes, some had just shorts and a T-shirt, and it was not my style at all. I felt over-dressed and I saw the next semester go to trash, “I’m going to hate this class, these kids are all so weird, they do not even know how to have a little style” I felt so alone along with some other students who were quiet sitting thinking