How to Read Body Languauge

If the eyes are the windows of the soul, then the body is the mirror of

our feelings. If we are feeling great it shows in how we hold and use our

body. Conversely, if we look at someone else's body we can often tell how

they are feeling by the signals their body is giving.

So when it comes to dating, using/reading body language signals is a great

tool. You can observe this by watching a couple flirting with each other.

In case you don't think learning how to read and use body language is not

important, here are some statistics about the messages we receive from

someone we meet.

Ð'* 7% of the information we receive is from what they actually say.

Ð'* 38% of information we receive is from the tone, inflection and speed

of their voice.

Ð'* A staggering 55% of the information we receive is from their

body language.

These non-verbal signals will help you in dealing with the person but stay

focussed on what the person is saying. If you focus too much on their body

language signals, you and/or the other person may feel uncomfortable.

It is useful to be able to read people's body language, but it is equally useful

to learn how to get your body to send the right signals and eliminate the

wrong signals. See below for some body language signals.

Be warned: body language is very much open to interpretation. Many

signals have different meanings depending on the person/situation. Keep this

mind when you assess a body language signal.

Note: Look for 3 or 4 signals that convey a similar message or the oneoff

inconsistent signal. Also, consciously practise reading/doing some of

the signals as much as you can. Learning, as you practise, what works

and what doesn't work for you will help you gain confidence to use body

language techniques consciously.

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Body Language Signals:

Ð'* Open arms:

o Energetically open and possibly feeling vulnerable

o A good way to show you are approachable, especially when

combined with open palms

Ð'* Palms up/open hands:

o Defences down

o An open heart

Ð'* Palms on chest Ð'- When a person uses open palms that occasionally

touch their chest, they are signalling honesty

Ð'* Outward, upward hand movements Ð'- This conveys an open and

positive message

Ð'* Folded arms:

o A defence mechanism that shows the person is not open to what

is being said or done

o May mean rejection

o Physically cold

o Stubborn in their outlook

Ð'* Hands closed Ð'- A closed heart

Ð'* Doodling Ð'- Bored

Ð'* Fist:

o Anger and to be avoided

o Physically cold

o Very tense

o Defiant or triumphant when held in air

Ð'* Feet under the chair Ð'- A sign of eagerness

Ð'* Looking around:

o Wants to get away

o Thinking about something else

o Bored with situation/conversation

Ð'* Stroking chin Ð'- evaluating

Ð'* Mirroring Ð'- This is evidence of two people getting on really well.

Each person copies the other's body language, usually subtly.

Mirroring occurs with:

o Breathing

o Gestures

o Eye movement

o Leaning towards each other at the same time

o Crossed or uncrossed legs

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o Speech pattern

o Arm movement, or no arm movement

o Emotive energy such as being excited, relaxed, etc.

Note: If you practice this with somebody the key is to be subtle and

not be a copycat. There is a natural rhythm to the process, which is the

key.

Ð'* Yawning:

o Bored

o Tired and that may have nothing to do with the

situation/conversation

Ð'* Preening Ð'- This shows someone knows they are attractive

For example, flicking or stroking their hair or adjusting a collar and/or

a tie.

Ð'* Ear Tugging:

o Indecision

o Possible deception

Ð'*