Losing the Way Written by Kristen Skedgell M.S.

Therese Buffalohead

Abnormal Psychology 3013 - 002

Mr. Hughes

Book Report: Losing the Way

        Losing the Way was written by Kristen Skedgell M.S. about her life and experience in the Cult called The Way International.  Kristen’s story begins in the early 1970’s in a small suburb outside of New York City.  She is 14 and the youngest of three children.  Kristen has two older brothers that do not really pay much attention to her.  Her parents are both highly educated.  Her father is a practicing alcoholic, both depression and alcoholism run on his side of the family.  Her mother is a workaholic and has depression on her side of the family.  She came from a broken home and suffers feelings of rejection and of being abandoned.  Kristen’s maternal Grandmother was diagnosed as Manic-Depressive.  Her father hasn’t worked in 3 years due to his alcoholism and depression.  He was forced by his wife to go to treatment twice but it did not stop his drinking.  For the most part her parents do not pay much attention to her whereabouts which leads to her being feeling emotionally detached and unloved by her family.  Kristen spends most of her time seeking love and stability in her life.  

The first time she was molested was at the age of 3 by a drunk from the bar next door that would bring her candy.  This went on for several months, but she never told her parents because she liked the attention that she was receiving from the man.  The next time she was molested she was 7 and it was by one of her brothers’ friends while they were playing hide and seek in the basement.  Her brother caught it occurring but did nothing to help her so she rationalized it in her mind that it must be okay like her and her brother “playing doctor”.  Out of her desire for love and attention, she became sexually active at the age of 13 with older boys in the neighborhood and school.  She learned to disassociate her feelings from her body while having intercourse because she was terrified of being rejected and this was the only type of “love” and attention she was receiving; therefore, it was better than nothing in her mind.   She continued searching for love through sex when she came upon The Way ministry.  

Kristen was associating with older teens, smoking pot and having sex on a regular basis with various partners in the hopes that someone was going to love her and pay attention to her.  She was invited to New York City by one of her friends to listen to a DJ preach about a new ministry called The Way.  She went even though her drunken father told her she couldn’t.  They met in the DJ and his wife’s apartment.  He began telling them about God and how he used to commit adultery and was lost until he found The Way.  She was in shock that he would tell his secret like that; Kristen looked at his wife thinking she must be feeling embarrassed and rejected because that is how it would make her feel.  But instead his wife stood there smiling.  This was strange to Kristen because in her family they were supposed to keep secrets about her father’s drinking and not working.  Kristen was good at keeping secrets about many things that happened in her life.  At the end of the meeting, Barry, the DJ, prayed for all of them asking God to forgive them.  Kristen sits there feeling nothing, she didn’t feel enlightened, she didn’t feel like a weight had been lifted from her shoulders, she felt nothing and wasn’t sure that she was worthy of forgiveness.  Returning home, she laid back and listened to the others talk about what they had heard and how they wanted to become a part of this new exciting Ministry that was telling them that God was the way.  According to the Dr.  the “way of the 5 senses” which is the way of man and the world doesn’t work only the way of Jesus Christ and God’s love was going to work to save this world.  One afternoon, Jonathon, came over and started talking about how God was beautiful and he could make everything beautiful.  This caught her attention because if God could make Jonathon talk to her and if he could make her beautiful this was something she might want to join.  Soon her circle of friends was excitedly talking all the time about Jesus and The Way.  She wanted to belong so she paid her $40.00 to take the Power for Abundant Living (PFAL) class.  

The PFAL class met every night for 2 weeks, 3 hours a night.  They sit huddled on the floor of a barn listening to the class on an old tape recorder that whines as it whirls around, the voice coming out of the tape is Dr. Victor Paul Wierville an Ohio farmer turned preacher. The Doctor prefers being called The Teacher as he is teaching the Word of God.  Kristen sits back daydreaming during class about what the Doctor looks like.  She becomes fixated on his words like he is speaking directly to her.   She sometimes wonders if God can really love her since nobody else does, but the Doctor says that God loves everyone so that must mean her too?  During the course Dr. Wierville explains many things to them about the world of 5 senses and how this is man’s downfall.  He has studied the bible, questioned if it was the real word of God and God gave him the answers.  He even guaranteed it, if you didn’t get the answers to 95% of your questions about God and life by the end of the course he would refund your $40.00.  Surely, he wouldn’t do that unless he knew it to be true.  Besides, the Dr. had been touched by the Holy Spirit when he was just a small-town Minister and God had spoken to him and told him the truth and that it would spread around the world.  The final results for the class are to speak in tongues as this shows if you really believe and the Holy Spirit has taken residence in your soul.  Kristen doubts she will speak in tongues because she is still questioning the Bible and if it’s really the word of God and how does she know that the Doctors interpretation is the right one?  This is the last time that she will question the Doctors validity in many years to come.  The last night of class, Barry comes to pray with them.  The tape begins with the Doctor quietly telling them to stand up and breathe.  They all obey the tape.  Suddenly he yells out, “NOW” and she begins speaking in gibberish.  She is doing it, she is speaking in tongues!  The Dr. is right and all her doubts disappear.

The Doctor travels to her town to hold a town meeting with the public and congratulate the newly graduated PFAL class.  She is so excited to meet the Dr. and her mother even attends the meeting.  When he arrives, he is introduced to the graduates gathered anxiously waiting to meet him.  He speaks to her and even hugs her.  Suddenly it is as if her long lost father has come home.  She has been seeking the love of an older man, a man to be her father for so long and here he is, the Doctor is her “Spiritual Father”.