Metaphor Essay

My writing is like a little kid telling a story. All little kids do when telling a story is exaggerate on all the details. "They walked miles." "They ate tons." The monster was as big as a house.", every time I write I use my own form of exaggerating, procrastination. I am always the last minute student when it comes to work. Given I complete things well they are usually just barely on time or late. Sometimes my assignments never get completed at all.

This essay for instance, it's Thursday, February 17 and I'm just starting. I already had almost a week to do this particular assignment and it was due yesterday. I exaggerated how long it was going to take me, how hard it was going to be to write and anything else that would put it off just a little bit longer. Now that I'm started it looks as if it's only going to take me maybe half an hour to finish, then I want to kick myself in the ass for being so stupid by putting it off for so long. I say next time I'm not going to do this, but sure enough if you had a video camera set up in my house watching my computer the week before an assignment is due, you wouldn't even see me sit down to do it until probably 10 or 11 the night before it's due.

My style of writing fits the standard for what I believe at least 90 percent of all writing does. - 30% mandatory, 20% thought, and 50% bullshit. Everyone uses this method. They include what they need, the 30%, only think and add on for the other 20% of their writing time, then spend the other 50% with useless bull. If you took the time to dissect my writing you would see maybe 3 or 4 lines of actual useful information, and then the rest is all useful fillers.

I can't wait for the time to come where I don't need to write papers I feel are useless to my future, but until then I'm going to be using the 30 20 50 method as cited above. Maybe one day I'll adopt a new way, but in the words of Johnny Hall, "I Doubt It."