Parenting Styles

Parenting Styles

The nature versus nurture debate is a controversy that we will never solve. One side says that we are genetically predisposed to how our personality develops and the other side says it is how we are raised in society that controls how our personality is developed. One thing for sure is that family relationships compose one of the most, not if the most, important influential factor in a child’s development. One of the most influential relationships in these family relationships is the one between the child and the parents.

There are four aspects of family functioning that affect the development of children. One factor is warmth and nurturance. Children with warm and nurturing parents are more securely attached to their parents than those who have more rejecting parents. The second aspect is clarity and consistency of rules. Children who have parents that have clear rules that are consistently applied have children who are much less likely to be defiant or noncompliant. The third aspect is dependent on how much the parents demand from the parents. It’s the level of expectations they have for their children. Children who have high levels of expectations from their parents do much better in development. They have higher self esteem and show more generosity towards others. The final aspect is the level of communication between the parent and the child. Children who can openly talk to their parents and have a high level of communication have been found to be more economically and socially mature. Even thou each one of these aspects explains different categories, they occur together to form parenting styles.

Different combinations of these aspects make different parenting styles. There are four type of parenting styles: permissive type, authoritarian type, authoritative type and uninvolved type. Permissive parenting is high nurturance by the parents but low maturity demands and control and is low on communication. Authoritarian type parenting style is high in control and maturity demands by the parents but low in nurturance and communication by the parents. Authoritative parenting type is the “best” type of parenting style since it is high in all four categories, high in nurturance, maturity demands, control and communication. Uninvolved is exactly the opposite of the authoritative parenting type, it is low in all four aspects of family functioning.

Parents that exhibit permissive parenting type have children that have negative outcomes. “Researchers have found that these children do slightly worse in school during adolescence and are likely to be both more aggressive and somewhat immature in their behavior with peers in school”. (Boyd 203) These parents encourage their children to their fullest, but do not set limits. They emphasize creativity and feelings, although their children often feel unloved. These children often become rebellious against their parents. “Permissive parents give children as many choices as possible, even when the child is not capable of making good choices. They tend to accept a child's behavior, good or bad, and make no comment about whether it is beneficial or not. They may feel unable to change misbehavior, or they choose not to get involved”. (Iannelli) Permissive parents who have infants or toddlers usually let them do whatever they want, and call it a “growing” experience and cave into whatever the child wants.

Children that grow up in authoritarian families usually do not so well in school, have lower self esteem and are typically less skilled with peers. These parents demand a lot from their child, but do not give in response. “Giving orders and setting strict rules to be obeyed is common in their method. Often stereotyped as a вЂ?Military Style’, this technique can sometimes lead to physical abuse”. (Boyd 202) Authoritarian parents don't explain why they want their children to do things. If a child questions a rule or command, the parent might answer, "Because I said so." Parents tend to focus on bad behavior, rather than positive behavior, and children are scolded or punished, often harshly, for not following the rules. Authoritarian parents with infants or toddlers tend to rush their children into doing more than they should at that age. For example, making them walk before its time for the child to walk.

Children that are brought up in families that have authoritative family styles have a trend of showing higher self esteem, self confidence, achievement oriented and are more independent but also are more likely to act in accordance with the parents. Parents’ help children