Pornography Addiction

Webster's dictionary defines addiction as a habitual psychological and physiological dependence on a substance or practice beyond one's voluntary control. The essence of all addiction is the addicts' experience of powerlessness over a compulsive behavior, resulting in their lives becoming unmanageable. The addict is out of control and experiences tremendous shame, pain and self-loathing. The addict may wish to stop --- yet repeatedly fails to do so. In this sense, there are many things that can become addictive.

One such area is that of human sex and sexuality. Such an area of concern is very broad, but a number of sex addicts say their unhealthy use of sex has been a progressive process. It may have started with an addiction to masturbation, pornography (either printed or electronic), or a relationship, but over the years progressed to increasingly dangerous behaviors.

With this in mind, Pornographic addiction will be the area of greatest concern. At first glance, unless you are of strong religious persuasion, pornography seems to have no harmful effects what-so-ever. But if you are to dissect this addiction, there are many problems that arise. One of the most vital parts of mental environment is a healthy idea of who we are sexually. If these ideas are polluted, a critical part of who we are becomes twisted. The porn culture tells you that sex, love and intimacy are all the same thing. In porn, people have sex with total strangers -- people they just met. All that matters is my satisfaction. It doesn't matter whose body I'm using, as long as I get it. Porn gets you to think that sex is something you can have anytime, anywhere, with anyone, with no consequences.

Pornography also creates underlying lies that do not manifest themselves as such unless separated out and realized in the normal world. According to Gene McConnell, these lies are:

Ð'* Lie #1 - Women are less than human

The women in Playboy magazine are called "bunnies," making them cute little animals or "playmates," making them a toy. Penthouse magazine calls them "pets." Porn often refers to women as animals, playthings, or body parts. Some pornography shows only the body or the genitals and doesn't show the face at all. The idea that women are real human beings with thoughts and emotions is played down.

Ð'* Lie #2 - Women are a "sport"

Some sports magazines have a "swimsuit" issue. This suggests that women are just some kind of sport. Porn views sex as a game and in a game; you have to "win," "conquer," or "score." Men who buy into this view like to talk about "scoring" with women. They start judging their manhood by how many "conquests" they can make. Each woman I "score" with is another trophy on my shelf, another "notch" in my belt to validate my masculinity.

Ð'* Lie #3 - Women are property

We've all seen the pictures of the slick car with the sexy girl draped over it. The unspoken message, "Buy one and you get them both." Hard-core porn carries this even further. It displays women like merchandise in a catalog, exposing them as openly as possible for the customer to look at. It's not surprising that many young men think that if they have spent some money taking a girl out, they have a right to have sex with her. Porn tells us that women can be bought.

Ð'* Lie #4 - A woman's value depends on the attractiveness of her body

Less attractive women are ridiculed in porn. They are called dogs, whales, pigs or worse, simply because they don't fit into porn's criteria of the "perfect" woman. Porn doesn't care about a woman's mind or personality, only her body.

Ð'* Lie #5 - Women like rape

"When she says no, she means yes" is a typical porn scenario. Women are shown being raped, fighting and kicking at first, and then starting to like it. Porn teaches men to enjoying hurting and abusing women for entertainment.

Ð'* Lie #6 - Women should be degraded

Porn is often full of hate speech against women. Women are shown being tortured and humiliated in hundreds of sick ways and begging for more. Does this kind of treatment show any respect for women? Any love? Or is it hatred and contempt that porn is promoting toward women?

Ð'* Lie #7 - Little kids should have sex

One of the biggest sellers in pornography is imitation "child" porn. The women are "made-up" to look like little girls by wearing pony tails, little girl shoes, holding a teddy bear. The message of the pictures and cartoons is that adults having sex with kids is normal. This sets the porn user up to see children in a sexual way.

Ð'* Lie #8 - Illegal sex is fun

Porn often has illegal or dangerous elements thrown in to make sex more "interesting." It suggests that you can't enjoy sex if it isn't weird, illegal or dangerous.

Ð'* Lie #9 - Prostitution is glamorous

Porn paints an exciting picture of prostitution. In reality, many of the women portrayed in pornographic material are runaway girls trapped in a life of slavery. Many having been sexually abused. Some of them are infected with incurable sexually transmitted diseases that are highly contagious and often die very young. Many take drugs just to cope.

To be able to fight this addiction one must first admit they struggle with pornography. But it is not easy to break it on your own. You must not be afraid to seek out someone you can confide in. Coming back to the religious side, there are many people who are able to help such as a pastor, a youth group leader, etc... Someone you can completely trust, feel safe with and has experience in the area of addiction isn't going to be surprised.

The human mind is one that relies on certain inputs to yield outputs and feelings, which allow for pleasure, pain, and the like. When fighting this addiction, the main issue is keeping your mind preoccupied. When allowed to roam it will expect and create urges to receive the input it is used to for pleasure. Finding a hobby that creates pleasure and realizing that pornography brings a temporary pleasure, is a way to defeat such urges and cravings.

With this in mind, Pornographic addiction will be the area of greatest concern. At first glance, unless you are of strong religious persuasion, pornography seems to have no harmful effects what-so-ever.