The Problem of Domestic Violence

The Problem of Domestic Violence

February 6, 2005

The Problem of Domestic Violence

"He would hit us with almost anything. His favorite beating tool was electrical cords. He'd use cords from lamps, the toaster, and the iron. He'd hold the lamp in his hand and whip us with the cord. I would have marks on my arm from the prongs of the plug that looked like snake bite wounds." (Anonymous Female, personal communication, January 20, 2005). Each year over 4 million women report being abused (US Department of Justice, 1998). Are we doing enough to deal with the problem of domestic violence, or is it exaggerated?

Domestic violence occurs in all segments of our society regardless of religion, race, class, sexual orientation, or educational level. The exact numbers of reported domestic violence cases varies greatly, the statistics range from 188, 000 to a whopping 60 million reports of abused women per year. These estimates are based on what the National Coalition Against Domestic Violence "hears" from various shelter programs. The higher estimates are adjusted for under reporting. More focus is put on women as victims of abuse because they are affected the most (Nelson, 2004). The difference in numbers is determined by the definition used by whoever is collecting the data. The definition of abuse varies between agencies and groups. Some define domestic violence as one person in an intimate relationship who uses sexual, physical, and emotional abuse to gain power and maintain control over the person (Iverson, 1998). Other people include the raising of your voice in an argument, one person being in control over making important decisions in the relationship, and throwing objects (not distinguishing between a hammer and a pillow) as well as battering in the definition of domestic violence.

Why do women stay in these assaultive domestic relationships? Most abusive relationships begin like any other relationship- with love. Many batterers are often very charming and popular men who keep their terrorizing, controlling behaviors within the family behind closed doors. Battered women are in committed relationships and have often times built their lives around the relationship. They hope for change. Their abuser will acknowledge the error of his ways; he'll break down, cry out the despair, and concede the need for dramatic change by promising never to abuse again; hope is often born anew for the victimized woman. It is difficult for a woman to leave an abusive relationship for many reasons. Men who abuse are often highly possessive and excessively jealous, they isolate their significant others to maintain the power and control of their violence. Many battered women lose their support systems as a result of the isolation. Many women stay in the relationship because of economics. It is not unusual for the batterer to control the money in the household, thus making saving money for the basic survival needs associated with leaving the relationship very difficult.

Batterers put up many barricades when the victim does decide to leave the relationship. If they have children the batterer may threaten to seek custody of their children; to withhold support monies; to interfere with her employment; to try to turn the children and family members against her; to threaten to kill her or other family members; or to threaten to commit suicide if she leaves.

Children who live in a home where there is domestic violence are impacted in a variety of ways. Some may not see the abuse happen, but all children living in a domestic abuse environment can feel the tension in the home (Iverson, 1998). Each child may react and display the effects of domestic abuse differently. Some may be disruptive and exhibit poor school performance, become aggressive, show anxiety, or may become withdrawn. Other children may take on the parental roles of taking care of siblings, protecting them and being authoritative. Overall, children who grow up witnessing domestic violence display significantly more behavioral problems and less social competence than children from non-violent homes.

The impact of domestic violence is widespread. It goes beyond the family unit, to effect employers, schools, and other agencies including health insurance companies. Employers estimated that 175,000 days of paid work were lost because of domestic abuse in 1981 (Horn, 1992). Costs have risen to almost 1.8 billion dollars a year in wages and lost productivity according to recent estimates from US Centers for Disease Control and Prevention (Nelson, 2004). Many women report having lost a job because of domestic violence, and roughly half the women in an abusive relationship who are employed, report their abusers have harassed them at work (Iverson, 1998).

U.S. Centers for Disease Control and Prevention report medical costs related to domestic violence exceeds $4.1 billion dollars per year. That figure directly impacts health insurance companies and the money you and I pay for premiums. The health care system is just now coming to realize the extent and harmful effects of battering, and is beginning to slowly develop systems to deal with it. Medical organizations have now established requirements to address domestic violence. Some doctors are reluctant to ask for fear of invading the person's privacy, risk of future harm, and asking about a problem that they can't solve (Nelson, 2004). "Questions about domestic violence are asked in less than 15% of clinical encounters, and only a few cases are ever identified." (Nelson, 2004, p.1)

Asking about domestic violence opens a door for patients who are