The Scilence That Binds

The Silence that Binds

Non-verbal communication is the invisible string that holds our culture together. Often non-verbal communication is described as communication without words; non-verbal communication refers to all aspects of a message which are not conveyed by the literal meaning of words. This differs from unconscious communication, which may be verbal or non-verbal. Both written and spoken communication can be non-verbal. The main types of Non-verbal communication are chromatics, kinesics, paralanguages, proxemics and semiotics. Culture, gender and social status all influence nonverbal communication.

Non-verbal communication is the most commonly used portion of the process of exchanging information. Up to ninety percent of all communication is non-verbal.

Non-verbal communication tells you to stop at a red octagonal sign to protect you from a dangerous intersection. It is how your eleven month old child is able to tell you she is in desperate need of a bottle or a nap. Non-verbal communication is everywhere around us all the time. The very concept of time revolves around non-verbal communication. The clock sitting in our courtyard right outside the window is communicating with me now, informing me that I am late for my History class. All of life revolves around non-verbal communication.

According to an article published by Shaver, Schwartz, Kirson, and O'connor in The Journal of Personality and Social Psychology facial expressions are recognized universally for their meanings. A smile indicates happiness while a grimace shows displeasure. The impact and use of facial expressions however, is culture bound. This becomes clear when comparing high context cultures of the far-east with the low context cultures of the western world. In china facial expressions are used far less and hold less impact than they do in America. The emphasis in communication within the Chinese culture lies primarily within the context of the spoken message itself. These differences can lead to misinterpretations between cultures. A Chinese man would have a much harder time reading the nonverbal signals of an American than he would a fellow Asian.

Non-verbal communication is fluid in nature, changing form from one moment to the next. Shifting from a solid line painted on the road to the symphony written by Mozart in the fourteenth century. Non-verbal communication can be something as complex as a space probe sent to the outermost reaches of the Milky-way; or, something as simple as a smile on the face of your new born daughter. In fact, there are so many different forms of non-verbal communication, that there have been numerous books written on the subject. So many books, that one could fill a library with works on this one subject alone. It is for this reason that I will explain my interpatation of non-verbal communication to you in the form of a narrative

Before I walk with you through a day in my life, I must first tell you what non-verbal communication is to me. In the world I perceive, non-verbal communication is the way we express ourselves; from the day we are conceived in the womb, to the day we are forgotten. Nonverbal communication is that tiny piece of fabric holding the boundaries of our culture tougher, shaping the rules and perception of our society.

This morning as I woke I heard the alarm click right before it begins to chime its wake up hymn. The birds singing by my window told me that it was to be an outstanding day. The sun was shining, the wind was whispering through the trees. As I look back to the clock it tells me that my daughter will awaken soon and I need to get out of bed and begin my morning. As I walk past the kitchen I begin to smell the coffee brewing in the pot. Its aroma is a bold and invigorating, just the thought of it alerts my senses. About then is when I realize how dreadfully cold the tiles are on the floor beneath my bare feet. I must have forgotten to turn the air conditioner off the night before. I shower and then dress. As I dress I am also putting on the message I will be wearing all day. Just as I am buckling my belt, I hear the soft whimper of my daughter Jolie. I had never dreamt of such wonderful timing. I would have just enough time to dress Jolie and send her off to the babysitter, and have time to make it to school on time for once. As I head for the door I hear the phone ringing in my coat pocket across the room. Think goodness it reminded me where I had hidden it. I had almost forgotten my cell phone at home again.

On the way to my car, I hear a song from a robin's nest. The robins sweetly soothe my inner being with their symphony. I smile to myself, thinking how warm the simplicity of life can be. As I pull out of the driveway, I notice the white and yellow lines on the road, silently guiding me as to where it is lawful for me to drive, or change lanes. While driving to school I see a sign on the back of a truck warning me the truck makes frequent stops and carries hazardous materials. This alerts me to keep my distance from the truck. As I come to an intersection, I see a traffic light dangling in the middle of the road silently directing traffic, effortlessly letting each lane of traffic know that it is or is not their turn to go or stop. As I pull away from the light, the gentlemen in front of me puts his left turn signal on, letting everyone around him know that we needed to pay attention to his automobile, he is about to change lanes.

Once I arrive at the school there is a campus police officer writing a ticket to a person who has parked illegally in the middle of the parking lot. This reminds me to follow the rules of the campus. There are so many rules here on campus that do not apply to my outside life. One example of this being designated smoking areas. I never smoke inside, but I can always smoke where ever I feel, as long as I'm outside. Anyway, as I grab my books the young woman walking behind me catches my immediate attention, as hint of her perfume dashes past my nostrils. The scent is of Angel perfume, the same scent that I bought my fiancÐ"©e last Christmas.

It amazes me how just the smell of something can communicate to you. The faint whiff of perfume on the wind can thrust you back in time to a place you may have never before visited; or ever discovered that these events had any value or significance to your life at all. Until that moment, the very moment that micro-second that certain chemicals touch the since receptors in your noise, everything then comes rushing back to you in the blink of an eye.

Now walking past the entrance to the C-building, I notice a look of deep despair on a young woman's face. I know this look all too well. The look itself conveys the emotion behind it for the entire world to perceive. This look is that of extreme sorrow, it is the