What Makes Me a Human Being

Naemi Mae C. Almachar                                                          AB-301

What Makes Me a Human Being

Conforming to Merriam Webster Dictionary, the word “human” means “of, relating to, or characteristic of humans and/or having human form or attributes” while the word “being” is defined as “a living thing, the state of existing, and the most important or basic part of a person’s mind or self.” Together, “human being” means “a person”. But what is it that makes me a human being? What makes me a person?

 “Experience is the teacher of all things” – a famous quotation said by Julius Caesar and from what I have learned for the past years of my life this is positively a true statement. Some of them are results of my own decisions while some are beyond my control. And I believe that these experiences of mine have left a significant mark in my life. Like, for example, having a happy and memorable childhood. I still remember playing outside with the other kids under the sun and not mindful of the hot sun. The unconditional love, care and support of my parents as I grow up. My mother, especially, has always pushed me to be a better person. She never fails to remind me of the values my grandmother has taught her such as honestly, humility, and perseverance. Even meeting my old and new friends and building friendship is a learning experience for me. There are people that are meant to just pass by your life while there are also those who are meant to stay. As they say, people come and go. To summarize, the early years of my life were blissful and innocent. However, if there was a turning point in my life when I started to certainly grasp the two realities of life, it was on my 3rd year high school. I have learned that romantic love is sweet and bitter in a hard way. When I had my first boyfriend, our relationship was surprisingly amazing. My best friend became my boyfriend and in my mind back then, everything was great. We practically knew almost everything about each other and were always there for one another. But considering it was our first serious relationship, we also had some bumps along the road. We argued but we see to it that we make-up. I wouldn’t elaborate more of what happened in between. After a year and 5 months, he broke up with me. There were things said that cannot be taken back. Words were thrown like knives to my heart. Unfortunately, my family was also going through seriously tough times at the same time. And in the middle of my broken heart and troubled family life, I discovered that the friends I trust the most were playing Judas behind my back. It was the most unbearable pain I have so far in my life. At that moment, something switched inside of me. Gone was the cheerful, positive, and hopeful girl. I got really depressed. I closed myself from everyone. I felt that I can’t trust anyone. I felt betrayed. I felt hurt. I felt helpless. I was afraid. I cried a lot; the tears that I have shed during those times were nothing to the tears past before that. The emotional pain affected my body physically. There came a point when I entertained the thought of ending it all by doing something I will totally regret. Looking back, I feel enraged with myself for even thinking of it. It was a stupid and cowardly thing to do. Eventually, I knew that I need to end the pity party and start standing up again. It wasn’t easy. I felt like I lost a huge part of myself and I don’t know how to start again. Old Rafiki said in the Disney animated film “Lion King”, “Yes, the past can hurt. But the way I see it you can either run from it or learn from it.” For most part, I know I changed – good and bad. No one leaves the battlefield unscathed and even at this time, I’m still learning from it. Some wounds just takes a little more time to heal.

By now, I can describe myself as a lot of things (and I had a little help from close friends and my siblings). I consider myself brave and fearless when in face of challenge or fear. Most of the time, I feel confident. I can also be direct and frank, straightforward; I openly say my opinion I know I have the capability to do something very well if I put my mind and heart into it. I am very animated and lively at times. And I think I do have a very sarcastic personality and sometimes can be annoying. I am also argumentative especially when the topic is something I feel very passionate about. I am daring and willing to take risks but at the same time I can be easygoing and carefree. I am able to endure or stand difficult situations. I am an open, honest person. I usually show my true feelings and opinions to the people close to me. I can also be self conscious or insecure sometimes. I consider myself also a bit mischievous because I, every now and then, act in troublesome way but only for fun! No harm done. I also make sure that I keep humble in whatever I do and as the same time I am proud of what I have achieved but not in the show-off way. I never liked people who look down on others. I am also moody. I can be hard to predict. I do think that I have a good sense of humour. There are also times that I can be difficult to understand. I also think that I can pass as a smart person and I am grateful that I was gifted with talents as well. I am logical in making decision and I see to it that I make decisions based on facts, reason, and clear thinking. On the other hand, I am also impulsive and act on sudden urges without thinking about it first. I do believe that I am an independent woman. I believe that I am able to stand on my own and that I am liable for any consequences of whatever decisions I make in life. I usually don’t like being boss around by someone but if I see that the person is deserving of the respect as a leader then I don’t have any problem following orders. I know that I am loyal, loving, sincere and a thoughtful person. I am a persistent person – continue to try even if there are problems or difficulties because I’d rather say that I gave a good fight than simply giving up which is something I rarely do. I do have a bad temper and is hard to please or satisfy. I have high standards on things (quality) and people (values). I can be pretty sociable because I am a talkative person but I am usually picky with the people I talk with. I have major trust issues since the “depression period”. Nevertheless, I consider myself a trustworthy person, ironic right? And lastly, I can be the most stubborn person you’ll ever meet. I can be difficult to deal with, talk to or reason with especially if you really pissed me off.