Love at Last

LOVE AT LAST

Statement of Intention

Love is an emotion which everybody relates to in a variety of ways. For most teenagers, love tends to revolve around materialism and aesthetics. Will I find a rich and successful husband who will love me? Will I find a dreamboat who will adore me? This piece of personal reflective writing attempts to humorously explore what love means at a deep and meaningful level. Explored through popular film, novels and television, love can be utterly confusing to my age group, however, when it is found, it is an utterly explosive and joyful experience worth waiting for.

In many ways, I guess that I am the year 12 sometimes Agony Aunt, and sometime Oprah Winfrey. Part time Dolly Doctor and full time shoulder to cry on. Given how much time I seem to spend solving other people's love issues, I sometimes feel that this is my 7th VCE subject. I'd achieve a 50/50 enter score, given my success rate at solving their many dramas. Either that or I could write some Chick Flicks and make a fortune.

I have three main positions: in front of the computer answering the seemingly hundreds of MSN messages demanding my attention; sitting on the couch consoling my Ð''boyfriends' girlfriend issues, one arm around their neck, the other holding the tissue box. My final position is trying to shower myself with one hand while I SMS people advice. I'm really not exaggerating, my life should be revolving around SAC's and Text responses, but the reality is, it spins out of control around the never ending tragedies of my class mates. I'm over it. Really over it. What about me? When will I have time for my own dramas?

I think I relate better to boys than girls. My weekends and holidays are often spent in my lounge room with a couple of my close boyfriends, watching our favorite film "The Notebook". It might be a chick-flick, but it seems to hold their wide eyed attraction. Somehow, deep inside, despite their pathetic, macho lusty longings for the coolest, coldest girl's in-group girls, they really just want to cuddle up to someone who will love them for ever. Poor sick puppies. Oh well, at least they can dream. The films centers on a couple who find each other again after years of being forcefully separated, then reunited. I've seem it a squillion times, but I still cry every time it ends. I'm a sucker for a love story. I just wish I could find someone who would wait for me and remain loyal, loving and adoring.

It seems that most of my friends break ups are caused by a lack of trust and loyalty. People cheating on each other, friends dobbing on each other, girls pinching their Ð''best friend's' boyfriend. I don't know, what happened to old fashioned values? Am I a fuddy duddy? Do I have an issue perhaps? Am I boring because I strongly believe that love is something built up over time and you work at your problems together? Earlier this year when we read "Romulus: My Father", I actually cried in so many places. I cried for Romulus when his wife cheated on him, while he was out working so hard to keep his family together. If only I could find such a strong, loving, passionate man who valued his family and friends and placed their well being as being his top priority. I also cried when he was lied to by Lydia, so that she could obtain her passport to freedom. At what cost to another human? I learnt through that book that some people are utterly selfish, and other's feelings are not taken into consideration. And I learnt that love can be cruelly withheld, such as when Raymond was left by his mother, despite her being incapable of nurturing him. Neglected and alone at nights in the dark, thank G-d for the loyalty of his dogs. The love of my mother at least I know is unconditional.

It's not that I constantly dwell on love 24/7. I do spend some time on my studies. It was one evening when I was studying "Gattaca" for the millionth time, when it suddenly dawned on me, that this too was a text which focused on love. What is it with Love and me? Love of space, love of an Ice Queen, love of an ideal, love of a value. When Vincent finally takes off into space in that last scene, I always cry because his love is fulfilled.

My grandfather is constantly trying to find love for me. However, love in the eyes of a 61 year old, conservative Kazahstanian is pretty dodgy. He drags me off to meet the grandsons of